Strength

I wanted to start doing extensions because I wanted a different life. I wanted to be home more with my kids and my husband. I wanted to make more money. I wanted to create a life that I never had any ability to create before. I wanted to do the impossible.

I had this crazy idea that I would be a million dollar stylist.

All of these things are absolutely still true.

But now I realize that extensions fell into my lap for a bigger reason than for me to just change my own life.

Years ago-even before extensions-I was having an issue with my boys’ dad. It was the holiday time, he was laid off work as usual and he didn’t pay his support for weeks. He knew the layoffs were coming so he could have gone to pay it ahead of time but he didn’t. And when I asked him about it, he acted as if I was he crazy one for thinking he should still pay me-he was out of work, but that also wasn’t my fault. And his out of work was not permanent, it was the usual yearly thing that happened for a few weeks at the same time each year. This wasn't the first time we had this argument. But this time he was married and his wife got in the middle and let me know I was greedy. I remember how upset I was and I remember arguing back and forth. During this entire time I was reading a book called “Uninvited.” One morning I read a passage that said, “it is impossible to hold up the banners of victim and victory at the same time.” It was in the middle of a biblical story where a woman, Abigail, realized that her husband and the other ma were going to continue to argue and there would never be a winner, literally one of them was surely going to die. She decided that she would take the blame, so she did because she knew she was the only one strong enough to handle it.

After reading that part of the book I went to workout. I was running and the line came to my mind. I heard it all spoken to me and then the part that hit me was that Abigail took the blame because she was the only one strong enough to handle it. I could feel that line DEEP within my soul. I knew I was meant to read that line and that one line changed the way I would coparent with my boys’ dad after that. I realized I was playing victim when I really wanted to have victory over the situation. I was trying to get him to take the blame. I was trying to get him to admit to everything he had done. But that would mean that he would have to admit to all the wrong he had done. Would that even really give me what I wanted?

I decided in that moment that I was going to approach things much differently. I was going to choose to not let these things bother me. If he wasn’t going to pay his support-that was on him. If he wasn’t going to get the kids when he was supposed to-that was on him. I was no longer going to take this on and pay victim to him anymore. Not because he wasn’t wrong or because I didn’t deserve to hear what I wanted to hear but because I knew I was the one with the strength. I could do these things. I could handle it. I was created to live a life that may have seemed unfair to others and make it something that others would wonder how it happened.

I realized long ago that this also tied into other areas of my life. I believe that I was guided down the road that I went in my career for more than just to change my life. I have done a lot that many others have never done. I have lived an “unfair” life in my career-I worked for less than a lot of others would, I worked hours others wouldn’t and shouldn’t, I learned things that most people can’t, I grew my knowledge in ways others never would be able to. And it wasn’t to just change my life.

It was because I was the one strong enough to do it all.

And I do not believe that strong people are created to weather their own storms-they’re created to help others do what they’d never be able to do one their own.

I don’t know what I am supposed to pass along. I don’t know how. But I do know that helping others is what I am supposed to do. I know it with everything I am.

I know I am meant to help others in ways they’ve never been helped before so they can get results they’ve never had before.

As I’ve already said, I don’t know how that will happen but I do know it will.

I hope you’ll help me get the word out to others and that I can be an inspiration to you!

Talk soon!